Gary Neville's birthday.

[Paul B]

Yes, fight fans, Gary Neville will celebrate his 31st birthday with his good friends from Liverpool if the 5th round FA cup tie is played, as expected, on the Saturday. Now I want you all to give Manchester's favourite son a real Scouse welcome when he runs on to the pitch for that game. Happy Birthday, Gary.

 

Also, has anyone mentioned we haven't beaten these soap-dodgers in the FA cup since 1921? Revenge is LOOOONG overdue.

[CarraLegend]

Yes, fight fans, Gary Neville will celebrate his 31st birthday with his good friends from Liverpool if the 5th round FA cup tie is played, as expected, on the Saturday. Now I want you all to give Manchester's favourite son a real Scouse welcome when he runs on to the pitch for that game. Happy Birthday, Gary.

 

Also, has anyone mentioned we haven't beaten these soap-dodgers in the FA cup since 1921? Revenge is LOOOONG overdue.

 

Carra should offer him a sandwich before the game with some "special mayo" inside.

[fred]

Wouldn't you just love it, the whole Kop singing an "appropriate" version of Happy Birthday (I'll leave the exact wording to those better qualified than me).

[Buzz]

We should give him a rousing rendition of "Happy Birthday Dot Cotton", to show him how gentlemanly and knowledgeable we are.

The Knob.

[Guest sniffer]

Jeez!! That's all I needed, to share my birthday with flippin' Gary Neville!

[Guest Jude]

Jeez!! That's all I needed, to share my birthday with flippin' Gary Neville!

 

Ha Ha,there was i going to suggest we all sing

Happy birthday you c..t

Happy birthday you c..t.

 

[Flasher]

I think the best thing to do would be to actually sing Happy Birthday (proper version) to him.

 

It would confuse the hell out of the Mancs, Fergie and Sky for that matter

Edited January 30, 2006 by Flasher

[Ronnie Whelan]

I think the best thing to do would be to actually sing Happy Birthday (proper version) to him.

 

It would confuse the hell out of the Mancs, Fergie and Sky for that matter

 

 

I think Happy Birthday you c*** has a better ring to it!

[floyd]

What Gary really want's for his 31st, is not a win over Liverpool, it's the ability to grow a moustache like his hero, Magnum

[CarraLegend]

I like the idea of Carra, Momo or Gerrard breaking the t***s leg and we all laugh at him and sing Happy Birthday while he's carried off on a stretcher.

[Ian Mc]

Wembley 1996 ..........

 

Then the sounds of breaking seats and hearts at Old Trafford after our total collapse in 1999! Never felt so low after a lfc footy match than this.

 

Rat Face Neville taunting us at the end. Seats gettin lashed at Adolf red nose.

 

PAYBACK TIME

[Hightown Phil]

Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you,

You are the biggest c*nt in the world, are ugly, inbred and should be kiled for crimes against moustaches.

 

Don't think it fits though.

[Crazy Horse]

Happy birthday you c***

Happy birthday you c***

You're an in-bred, ugly b*****d

Happy birthday you c***

[Ombudsam]

I like the idea of Carra, Momo or Gerrard breaking the t***s leg and we all laugh at him and sing Happy Birthday while he's carried off on a stretcher.

 

we have an early leader

[Guest 7777]

Its your birthday you can cry if you want to

 

would be rather appropriate at the final whistle

[Spike]

As Sir Ciff of Richard may sing

 

Con-gra-tu-lations, your celebrations

show what an inbred you are

 

can't grow a moustache, face like a burst gash

takes his bluenose brother up the a***

 

Oh gary neville, has found his level,

captain of a team on the decline

 

and though we hate him, we won't debate him

when the fact is we won it five times

[Guz]

Be even funnier if he's banned for the game after his celebration?

[Gray - YPC]

Be even funnier if he's banned for the game after his celebration?

I want him playing.

 

1) He's s***

2) He's good for being 5 yards behind the play to play someone onside

3) There's always the chance of a penalty or a volleyball handball

4) We can give him loads of s***

[fyds]

Happy birthday to you,

you were conceived in the loo

Since when your sister is your mother

and your brother is too!

 

'Oh he's got twelve tiny fingers, and twelve tiny toes..

and he'll never grow a moustache

Underneath his inbred nose

and he has an admas apple the size of a ballc*ck,

and his mother shaves and she's going bald

and his father wears a frock..'

 

'Gary Neville - he hates humans...'

Edited January 30, 2006 by fyds

[Ian Brown]

Oh dear he's gonna have the worst birthday ever!

Can't wait...

[anny road]

Be even funnier if he's banned for the game after his celebration?

 

 

would it b****x

 

i want him out on that f***ing pitch the inbred gobby t***........

[Ian Brown]

would it b****x

 

i want him out on that f***ing pitch the inbred gobby t***........

 

You don't half seem angry today, you got the sh*ts or something?

[anny road]

You don't half seem angry today, you got the sh*ts or something?

 

 

perfectly calm

 

i just was that c*** to get his just desserts

[Spion kop]

the mans a legend, here's his thouughts on the week

 

THURSDAY

If I ever kiss a girl (eurrrggh) and become a daddy then I shall call my son (or daughter) after the best person ever, ever, ever. He (or she) will be Sir Neville. I told dad and he was upset so maybe I'll have to call him (or her) Sir Neville Neville. I wonder if they will inherit my bushy moustache.

Phil B***ardsley (ha ha) thinks he can play the most important position on the pitch for the best team ever after last night against Burton. But what he forgot until I told him today in the car park and then during training and then at lunch and then on the phone later was that he was really, really rubbish until I came on and turned the game when we were winning just 3-0 and struggling without me.

I'll tell Sir to send him to Preston.

 

FRIDAY

Sir shouted at me for not giving Phil a bib this morning. He says we need TWO right-backs - this is the worstest thing he's said to me since he told me to 'f*** off out of his garden'.

Went to the pictures because Rio said I'd really, really like Brokeback Mountain and would identify with the main characters. I thought he said Rightback Mountain and it would be about handsome right-backs with fantastic facial hair. It wasn't. I cried.

 

SATURDAY

Silly Billy Philly and his little Neverton team beat a***-nal so I've promised mum not to give him a Chinese burn for at least 24 hours. I tried to appeal the suspension but she was quicker than usual up the stairs.

We watched Dancing On Ice. I could do that when I'm 44 and retire, just before I take over as manager of the best club in the world ever and win the Historic Quadruple and become Lord Sir Gary Neville OBE MBE CBeebies.

 

SUNDAY

Diiiiirty diiiiirty Scousers, diiiiirty diiiiirty Scousers. We won, we won, we won, you lost, you lost, you lost. And I did the coolest celebration in front of the diiiiirty, diiiirty Scousers that some people said was like when a boy and a girl do sex, which probably means that girls will think I want to do sex with them, when everyone knows that girls smell. I did do a sex wee though.

Did my celebration for mum and grandma today after Sunday lunch (sprouts, euugghh) and they said I'll look handsome in the papers. Hope the camera captures my moustache, because sometimes in pictures it doesn't look as bushy as in real life.

Too excited to sleep so I'm reading Sir's book again. I know it nearly off by heart now, which is lucky because some of the pages don't open anymore.

 

MONDAY

I have been hidden in my mum's cupboard all day after Rio texted me to say that the police wanted to talk to me about 'exciting the crowd'. I don't want to go to jail because Rio says a handsome boy like me would be popular in the showers. And I prefer baths.

When mum tempted me out with a bowl of Frosties (she says I'm grrrrrrreat) I heard that Sven is leaving after the World Cup, probably because I phoned Brian Barwick to say there were too many Scousers in the team. They say it's not but I know different, because his secretary said he was 'interested to learn my views'.

I think I am the right man to replace him. If I'm not in jail.

 

TUESDAY

Who's Sam Allardyce? Apparently he manages a club in Lancashire, but everyone knows there's only one club in Lancashire. I'm confused! He can't be allowed to manage England and neither can 'Big Phil' Scolari - a) because he's called Phil and everyone knows that's a silly name and b) because he probably thinks his moustache is better than mine. Which it's not.

It should be me and David in a dream team. Like that film I saw the other night.

 

WEDNESDAY

We're in the final of the most important cup competition in the world (that I haven't won yet) after beating some little team called, I think, Blackburn. I was brilliant of course, though Edwin (I always preferred Sweary Tim) tried to make me look silly by not reacting quick enough to my perfect backpass.

That nasty man Robbie Savage tried to make trouble in the tunnel but, as I'm the captain now, I couldn't sort him out properly. I had to lock myself in the changing-room, because a captain can't get into any trouble. And I had to wait until I was sure he'd left the ground, because I'm the captain now. Roy would have done the same.

 

THURSDAY

I've been charged. I'm running away to Malta

[fyds]

You don't half seem angry today, you got the sh*ts or something?

I thought anny was having one of his quieter days today, Ian...he's been laying off the rare beef wellington with the boef sauvage starter and the t-bone steak pudding, followed with a quart of bulls blood. He just has a light Frappé ala Steroid these days.

 

You should have a nice chat with him about Dave Usher sometime - he loves talking about Dave!