Ageing Parents

charlie clown · January 27, 2023

I think most of us on here are at an age where we have parents (if we're lucky enough still to have them around) who are heading towards, or already have got to the point where they need support or care to one degree or another. My mum will be 90 on her next birthday, she still drives, she lives alone but has a very active social life etc. but I think the the last three years has really hit her pretty hard. She is now noticeably less confident, less outgoing, more forgetful (although I'm pretty sure that the latter is just age-related forgetfulness rather than dementia - I've seen the latter up really close and it's nowhere near the same).

A couple of nights back two fellas knocked on her door asking for money for a charitable donation to something or other. Being the trusting and generous soul that she is she said she would like to but she had no cash and she wasn't sure where her bank card was. She then remembered that she'd left her bank card in her purse which was in her handbag which was in her unlocked car. She offered a payment to them. They went on their way.

All of this only emerged when she went to a coffee morning yesterday and she was chatting to one of her friends who told her that that might be a bank fraud and she'd need to check with her bank. One of the other people who helps out at the coffee morning called the bank for her and they got it all under control. Luckily there had been no fraudulent activity on the account and no one had tried to set up any direct debits or anything. Cards have been cancelled etc. So to a degree it's a case of all's well that ends well.

But of course I'm now in a mild panic about what to do next. Lasting Financial Power of Attorney is a priority but I'm also thinking that one of those Ring type doorbell things would be good too - but she doesn't have wi-fi or any device to monitor it with so there'd be a hell of a lot of disruption to get that all sorted and then there'd be the issue of teaching a near-90 year old how to manage the new tech.

And if those lads who turned up two nights back were genuinely from a charity I'd be going hard at the charity for allowing their chuggers to be out on dark nights approaching vulnerable pensioners.

Edited January 27, 2023 by charlie clown

Gethin · January 27, 2023