Fatigue

£440,000 · August 2, 2015

I'm off on holiday later on today, and I don't think I've ever needed one quite as much.

I've been doing some work on top of my normal job and had two days off in the last 90. I took on something that I thought paid well, but it turned out to be more complicated than it was supposed to and it's been eating my free time. I'm so tired.

Last night I threw out part of a toy I'd recently bought for my six-month-old cos I wasn't thinking straight. Then I lost my house keys. I think I left them in the front door, so I've had to change one of the locks today. I also put my girlfriend's number in my online bank and I've blocked that.

I don't know whether it's workload or age, or both, but I feel destroyed. My body aches.

I'm trying to earn more money for the family, but then it's meant me not seeing the family. I'm missing a lot of some of the best months of my little girl growing up.

When I get back from my holidays, I think I'm going to have another month of the same.

None of this is making me rich so maybe it's just not worth it for the time I'm losing and what I'm going to myself.

I'm sure I'm not the only one here in this predicament.

Crazy Horse · August 2, 2015