Your first proper gig

smithdown · December 9, 2008

Well, mine was half a gig really and would be a much more impressive story if it weren't for the fact it was Genesis.

Wtf? I've raided all the record collections in our family and nobody ever had a feckin Genesis record. No-one. But about 7 of us went down to Knebworth in...79? in a Lada estate with a great big feck off tent on the roof rack and 2 dogs.

Got lost in the dark lanes of wherever Knebworth is after midnight, turned left through a gate, tented up, woke up in the middle of what appeared to be a motorway roundabout - how we larfed and shat one at the same time. How do you get out? Very fecking quickly is how, not easy in a laden down Lada.

Got to the camp site, even giving some wild-haired filthy hippy a lift to his bike which was stranded somewhere - dunno how we all squeezed in - who sat there with a petrol can on his knee with no lid, half a rollie hanging in his beard and asking if he can like bum a light man? His hair would have stood on end at the collective "F*CK OFF!" if it weren't already.

Get to the camp. Happy days. Bonfires on the go, me Ma doing sausage butties for everyone, feckin allcomers were being drawn in like bisto kids. Uncles and Dad telling them to eff off, he's already been that one, go 'ed you ya greedy tw*t.

Highlight was probably the fella who crashed out and his boot caught fire. That was excellent. Think he was from Australia. His jeans were smoking, man. He just sat back down after jumping about and stared into the fire for a bit.

I got told off after telling everyone that over the way were some people without a proper tent, just see through plastic sheets on sticks, and there was a woman with no top on lying there and some other people. The clear plastic sheets had 'Legalise Heroin' written on with felt tip, lots of times. I wasn't allowed over that way anymore.

Then someone nearby went mad that their stash, no-one explained what that was btw and I did ask, had been dug up by some thieving swine. Dug up? Why would you bury something with all these people about? That's mad. What is a stash anyway? After a short debate it was decided that one of our dogs must have done it. I'm not sure that it did but that's what my Dad and uncles thought had happened. They made that quite clear.

Everyone else f*cked off through the trees and I stayed behind with my Dad, probably tired, and he seemed content making his cigarettes and smiling and eating stuff. Then he decided we'd go and look for the dogs, and we walked through and there was a band on miles away making some pointless droning noises and then there were some fireworks, which were alright. And then the next day we went home. And still nobody has a Genesis record in our family. They're sh*te.

goodrobotusses · December 9, 2008

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