So what's a good result for us on Saturday - Chelsea v Man U

[Gravy]

If United win are Cheslea's heads down and they fold or play better the following week. If Chelsea win are their tails up or will they be a bit cocky in the second leg?

 

Decisions, decisions.

 

Oh and by the way Riise, you useless ginger t***

[MFletcher]

United score early.

 

Chelsea are forced to chase the game before nicking two goals in the last five minutes.

[johngibo YPC]

I'd prefer

Chelsea score three early goals, all penalties. 3 United players are sent off.

Chelsea then have 3 players sent off for fighting with each other.

United get two goals due to Cech's arm falling off, but Chelsea win 3 - 2

[RedMarauder]

Both lose, have 20 points deducted, lots of injuries and Cameron Diaz comes around my house absolutely gagging for it

[Woodsyla]

Chelsea getting a man sent off early and having to chase after Utd for 85 mins

[ManxRed]

Drogba actually getting shot by a sniper in the crowd instead of pretending he has about seven times during the game.

[Billy Dane]

Drogba actually getting shot by a sniper in the crowd instead of pretending he has about seven times during the game.

 

Can it be a Kennedy magic bullet that also takes out Joe Cole?

 

Two diving t***s with one stone as it were.

[Rory Fitzgerald]

Terry clatters into Ronaldo - both incur minor injuries that keep them out for 6 weeks.

 

Ferdinand clatters into Drogba - both incur minor injuries and are ruled out for 6 weeks.

 

Ferreira clatters O'Shea - both walk away unhurt.

[ManxRed]

Can it be a Kennedy magic bullet that also takes out Joe Cole?

 

Two diving t***s with one stone as it were.

 

"As you can see from the replay Brian, there's minimal contact with Ferdinand, but both Cole and Drogba then fall back.... and to the left.

 

Back..... and to the left.

 

 

 

 

 

Back..... and to the left"

[Andy @ Allerton]

Russian satellite crashes into that pit of a ground.

 

All the players are stunned and take 3 weeks to recover.

[RP]

One of those big new double-decker jumobos veers off course on it's final approach to Heathrow, engine trouble etc ...

[ManxRed]

Russian satellite crashes into that pit of a ground.

 

All the players are stunned and take 3 weeks to recover.

 

And Abramovich has the insurance claim on the satellite rejected... :icingoncake:

Edited April 23, 2008 by ManxRed

[Old red eyes]

Terry fouls Ronaldo in the box doing Ronaldo's and his own metatarsals in the process and is sent off. Rooney shoes the penalty into row Z knocking JT's ma out. Chelsea have to run their b******s off the remaining 80 minutes and Drogba pulls his hamstring while diving to the ground as they get a controversial free kick in the last minute. Ballack misfires but Scholes completes a s***ty week for Ginger pricks by heading the ball into his own net. Chelsea win 1-0 and Rooney is sent off at the final whistle for nutting that c*** Essien.

[MickeyDocs]

Terry fouls Ronaldo in the box doing Ronaldo's and his own metatarsals in the process and is sent off. Rooney shoes the penalty into row Z knocking JT's ma out. Chelsea have to run their b******s off the remaining 80 minutes and Drogba pulls his hamstring while diving to the ground as they get a controversial free kick in the last minute. Ballack misfires but Scholes completes a s***ty week for Ginger pricks by heading the ball into his own net. Chelsea win 1-0 and Rooney is sent off at the final whistle for nutting that c*** Essien.

 

 

We don't need to beat Chelsea. 1-1 gets us extra time. 2-2 wins us the game.

We can rest the entire team at the weekend. They cannot.

[Old red eyes]

We don't need to beat Chelsea. 1-1 gets us extra time. 2-2 wins us the game.

We can rest the entire team at the weekend. They cannot.

 

 

I know.

[genghis]

Russian satellite crashes into that pit of a ground.

 

 

One of those big new double-decker jumobos veers off course on it's final approach to Heathrow, engine trouble etc ...

 

 

Damn! I was going to go for meteorite strike.

 

And obviously a 30 point deduction each for the little-known league rule about both teams finishing with fewer than 5 players. Or for allowing interplanetary debris on the pitch. Or something.

[ManxRed]

Damn! I was going to go for meteorite strike.

 

Feck it, let's wish for all three. Just in case Terry survives the first two.

Edited April 23, 2008 by ManxRed

[Herbie von Smalls]

a ten-goal winning margin for chelsea would leave the title run-in in their hands

[Beardsley]

A hard fought Chelsea win, but with huge casualties on both sides makes both teams drop out of the CL, while Chelsea scrapes home another PL title.

[BG]

"As you can see from the replay Brian, there's minimal contact with Ferdinand, but both Cole and Drogba then fall back.... and to the left.

 

Back..... and to the left.

Back..... and to the left"

 

Seinfeld fan?

[uncle bob]

Terry fouls Ronaldo in the box doing Ronaldo's and his own metatarsals in the process and is sent off. Rooney shoes the penalty into row Z knocking JT's ma out. Chelsea have to run their b******s off the remaining 80 minutes and Drogba pulls his hamstring while diving to the ground as they get a controversial free kick in the last minute. Ballack misfires but Scholes completes a s***ty week for Ginger pricks by heading the ball into his own net. Chelsea win 1-0 and Rooney is sent off at the final whistle for nutting that c*** Essien.

 

excellent

[Armin_Tamzarian]

In the build up to the game a keen eyed administrator at the FA discovers that due to an avoidable error neither team officially exist and they are therefore unable to compete in any UEFA sanctioned competition. Barcelona and Liverpool automatically advance to the final whilst Arsenal take the opportunity to withdraw from competitive football in favour of exhibition matches as they play such pretty football.

[R A Softlad]

Both lose, have 20 points deducted, lots of injuries and Cameron Diaz comes around my house absolutely gagging for it

 

If Diaz came round my house gagging for it I'd say 'Oi! Diaz! No! Go home but call your mate Drew Barrymore and send her over.'

[Kahnee]

One of those big new double-decker jumobos veers off course on it's final approach to Heathrow, engine trouble etc ...

 

Is the right answer

[Kahnee]

If Diaz came round my house gagging for it I'd say 'Oi! Diaz! No! Go home but call your mate Drew Barrymore and send her over.'

 

Still going for the 'sure-bet' ugly birds then...