Thursday jokes

[Michael]

A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary on the beaches of Acapulco. Their domestic tranquility and long marriage had quickly become the talk of the resort. People would say, "What a sweet and loving couple!"

 

The local news reporter even heard the story and thought it would make a nice editorial, so he interviewed them about the secret of their long and happy marriage.

 

The husband replied, "Well, it dates back to our honeymoon in Arizona fifty years ago. We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom of the canyon by horse. We hadn't gone too far when my wife's horse stumbled and she almost fell off. My wife looked down at the horse and quietly said, 'That's once.'

 

"We proceeded a little further and the horse stumbled again. Once more my wife looked at the horse and quietly said, 'That's twice.'

 

"We hadn't gone a half-mile when the horse stumbled for the third time, almost causing my wife to tumble down the face of the cliff. But she's a very agile lady, and she quickly got her balance, removed a revolver from her purse and shot the horse dead.

 

"I shouted at her, 'What's wrong with you, woman?! Why did you shoot the poor animal like that? Are you crazy?'

 

"She looked at me, and quietly said, 'That's once.' And from that moment we have lived happily every after."

 

 

 

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Mother Superior summons all the nuns together and says: "Sisters, I have to tell you that we have a case of gonorrhea in the convent"

 

An old nun at the back pipes up: "Thank goodness for that, I'm sick of Chardonnay"