Cam

I feel this is all our fault for mocking too early. But mainly Fyds' fault, obvs.

I mean four.

Onana taunted the Lyon fans on the first two goals of the evening. Not on the next three goals though.

ORIGI!!

That's just popped up on my YouTube recommendations. Lynam and Hill pretty much nailed it. Respect.

I'd fancy the winner of this to be too much for Inter and Barca in a final.

Flag!

No, iron only.

I hope this doesn't go to extra-time for Prince William's sake - he's got to be up early for work.

This is the PSG we all know.

I was aiming for Morgan Freeman but if Pasquale is cheaper & available...

The crowd was tense, unnecessarily & unhelpfully nervous and even toxic during that second half. A half we were largely in the lead for and, at worst, about to go 11 points clear. And it continued at 2-1. A draw would have made little difference yesterday as this title is done. Jurgen would have gone full batsh*t crazy at times. There were additional issues on the pitch - and the subs made it all worse - but if we're happy to accept our role as a 12th man when things go well we should accept that the crowd can influence the players negatively too. The worst offenders upped & offed bang on full-time, crowding round the exits for that extra 90 seconds head start. Stay in your seats and bask in the last minute winner, enjoy the glow of 13 points and applaud the lads for doing what you've been screaming at them for. If the Spurs game doesn't go the easy way from minute One it'll be pretty horrible at times. Of course, it'll be fine in the end because Spurs gotta Spurs. But the entitled pr*cks won't care that we're literally minutes away from the title - they want an easy & comfortable thrashing because that's how the highlights on TikTok & YouTube are. Win it at home for the fans? I'm not so sure some deserve it.

On the pitch? No. Off the pitch though...

Done alright, deserves a second season.

In the 5th minute of 4 minutes added on due to their time-wasting, an own goal by Partey, from a cross by one of ours who should have been sent off, after intercepting a pass by Sterling, minutes after VAR ruled out a presumed winner from Odegaard & thus ruined his latest 'camera' celebration, leading to Arteta sh*tting himself live on TV in white trousers. Or I refuse to acknowledge the title.

He was a bit apprehensive on the first couple of times West Ham got through on him but got away with it. However, after that it was business as usual and there was no way a West Ham player was going to score today.

Alisson seemed livid at Virgil's winner - slammed his water bottle in to the ground then had a grumble to himself.

It feels like Ward-Prowse is wandering around the pitch like he's cosplaying Mark Noble.

Alright Joey.

"... goal involvementing down the wing"

"And number 11 is MO SALAH!!"

We all saw this excuse coming. Chucking money at Mo and VvD was always going to be FSG's cheapest option.

Seemingly dropped for a second goalie on the bench. Still concerns about Alisson?

We're still top of the poultry-killing league. Miles ahead of Bernard Matthews but we need to keep an eye on bird flu.

I'm almost okay with that if it upsets Arteta.