melia

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Edit: Wrong bloody user!

He scores goals, that'll do for me. Don't care who he plays for now.

because, despite my fluency in Portugese (amongst other languages), it's only right and proper they address me in the Queen's English

I've not seen any of their games under Gérard Houllier. Does he still do that muttering thing when he's watching the game or was that confined to Anfield (in some Bob Wright-esque attempt at an incantation to break a curse)?

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Ok, I may have been drunk, but didn't they also hug before the game? My Missus made a point of saying "oo-er, they're a bit friendly aren't they?" so I'm fairly sure the hugfest began before the game.

I have to say, while Carlsberg are not the ideal sponsors, Mansion Casion do seem a bit tacky. I hope that our new sponsors are slightly more respectable.

after they scored their second my wife said "that's it game over". Cue me ranting about how we were gonna bladder them 5-2 and that they were s*** but we were just playing s***. Had no doubt, at any stage (ok, I did get a little worried just before the end of full time).

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He was mentioned as an option for us last summer. Don't think we'd have him now. I'm more interested in his take on the Houllier regime. Click Govou cool on Gers link French international Sidney Govou admits he is not currently tempted by a possible move to Rangers. Former Lyon coach Paul Le Guen takes charge at Ibrox this summer and Govou is one of a host of French names being linked with a move to Glasgow. Le Guen is expected to bring in a number of big names with the financial backing of Gers supremo David Murray. Govou, though, admits that he is not enamoured by Rangers and Scotland in general. "Could I join Le Guen at Rangers? I don't know," he told But! "I don't think I will go there, Scotland is not a league that attracts me." Govou does admit he could change his mind - but also suggests Marseille would be his preferred destination. "Perhaps I won't have the same words in a few weeks," he admitted. "Anyway Paul didn't call me, but L'OM? May be. "That could be exciting. L'OM is a special club." Govou also admits that he now must leave Lyon this summer. "I still have two years remaining on my Lyon contract, and at the moment I am thinking about my future," he said. "Before, I wanted to leave to improve, I see me in a great foreign club, but now things have changed and I absolutely need to see something else. "It is more psychological thing than a sport one. "I won't look only at a club's status." The striker insists that things at Lyon have changed. "Things are really different at the club now, the atmosphere, daily life," he said. "Since last season, I have less fun." EDIT: Dannylad, not Melia

it's even funnier if you read it whilst picturing Huyton Red being played by Spud from Trainspotting (think of the job interview scene).

I don;t get the English tabloids here so I'm (thnakfully) spared the gory details of certain professional footballers' social lives. I understand that Pennant has had a few moments in the scandal limelight but the details haven't reached me and, consequently, turned me away from his talents. Every time I see him he stands out as an awesome player and I really hope we go out of our way to sign him. Is he that much of a knob that it overrides his talent?

I just found the 1996 FA Cup final programme in the toilet (my son leaves his reading material where he needs it most) and noticed that it cost 6 quid. How much is this years?

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Just got this off ESPN international - Listing for ESPN Australia If you would have turned round and asked me instead of posting here, I would have checked and told you. Now go and put the kettle on and make me a cup of tea.

My wife is a teacher and, through friends of hers, she managed to volunteer our house for a fire service video starring John Barnes. The theme was 'Hoax calls kill' and the idea was to warn kids off from making hoax emergency service calls. When my missus told me that there would be a day's filming at my place and that Digger would be there I s*** myself and declared that I would spend the day at work and avoid contact (which I did). My thinking was that if I spent the day at home I would lose the plot and try to snog John Barnes. I got home from work that evening and my wife told me that JB had been round with his kids and his mate and they were all really nice. His daughter had left her dummy there (which, sadly, I still have in a box in my garage) and there were many photos taken of Digger in my house. I've still got the photos of him sitting on my sofa holding my youngest daughter who was only a few weeks old. The video was released for schools a couple of months later and the press launch date coincided with my son's birthday. The whole family were invited to Melwood and Sammy Lee and John Barnes bent over backwards to make us all feel welcome. There was a couple of highlights that day Sammy Lee introduced my son (celebrating his 10th birthday) to all the players. When Sammy tried to introduce Dan to Paul Stewart (who offered his hand for shaking), Dan turned his back and said "Nah, it's alright". I knew then that my lad understood football. I was carying my four year-old daughter and John Barnes (recognising her) came over to say hello. He leant over to kiss her and she shied away. I seized the opportunity and stuck my face in the way and managed to get JB's kiss planted on my cheek. He did see the funny side (thank feck). I also remember bumping into Macca, Paul Ince and Rushy in Retro just after Ince signed. In a fury of tactlessness, a lad we were with grabbed Ince's hand, nodded to Macca and said "welcome to the club and for f***'s sake, sort these spice boys out!"

RIP

Why is the first lazy and the second not? Anyway, isn't he just Dean Suanders mk2?

as opposed to (and please offer examples to help me understand your point)?

Sing for Sammy, ignore the other blert. He'll understand that he doesn't count. Just remember to sing for Sammy (and Stelios).